To My Formerly Frozen Embryo This Father’s Day

Dearest Elliana,

As  I wake up this morning hearing the clanking of dishes in the kitchen with you and mommy making my fathers day breakfast, I feel so blessed. 11 years I have woken up on this day looking forward to your excited whisper for me not to come out there, with a sparkle in those brown eyes.Your big brown eyes still amaze me. I look into them and am reminded of the promise I made to your mommy all those years ago when it seemed impossible that we would see you into our lives.

I promised her that we would never stop trying until we brought our soul baby into this world.

I know we have talked about what it means to really live your life with faith. When you try so hard for something and you don’t get what you hoped for, it’s easy to lose your faith.

That happened to me before I made that promise to your mommy. You were in that frozen embryo freezer out there in new jersey and I almost didn’t go to get you.

When I think about that I realize how close I came to not having your little miracle spirit in my life.

When we were outside yesterday talking about working on your letter to Michelle Obama to stop childhood obesity I realized you are making my dreams come true.

I always wanted to make the world a better place and  I still want to. I just never realized I made the world better the minute I made  that promise to mommy to never stop trying.

A few months after I made that promise,  we got the call we were pregnant with you and the world changed for the better. Not only were we the happiest we had ever been, but you had grandparents smiling about ways they’d spoil you, great grandparents anxious to hold you, cousins anxious to tease you…joy and excitement filled the world just knowing you were on your way.

10 months after that phone call,  I heard you cry and saw the doctor hold you close to your mommy, and  I knew right away what we would name you.

Even though we had a few other names we had made up those brown eyes spoke the name Elliana into our hearts. ‘God has answered our prayers’ is what the dog eared name book says Elliana means

But we knew we had to add Faith as your middle name because God had answered our prayers with faith

Faith to never stop doing whatever we had to.

Faith to pick ourselves up when something didn’t work and try again.

Every second, every minute of every day you make the world a better place. But not because of anything you do or want to do.

You have made my world better just by being born.  You are living proof of the power of faith.

From that first night rocking you until the sun rose on your second day of life to all our long talks about God and dreams and playing guitar and watching you dance, I never dreamed that being a daddy would be the greatest thing I ever did.

But it is.

Thank you for being such an amazing daughter.

Every fathers day is happy because I get to spend it with you, muffin.

I love you with all my heart


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