Okay—so when things get busy in my life and a little overwhelming and scary I tend to immediately pull back on the stuff that I really love to do, and immediately jump into the grind of shit I honestly think is growing out of me.
The truth is, I do have big plans for some big changes in our lives BUT I also made a commitment to Almost A Father to blog every day about something related to infertility to provide support for 365 days.
As of today I’m around day 115.
I have absolutely enjoyed every minute of writing on this blog.
I’m a writer.
And that writing is evolving into a future vision I am finally embracing.
Yes, I have worked during the day as the owner of a mortgage company and taken care of the needs of a lot of people very fairly and squarely to make sure they had the most successful homeownership experience possible.
But a few months ago, when I was blogging against all that embryo tracking crap the Arizona Senate was dredging up, I felt like I was on stage again performing in Nashville.
The most awesome thing that happened out of all those phone calls, all that blogging, emailing and faxing to protest that piece of legislative garbage, was I got asked to emcee the walk of hope by the lovely folks at Resolve.
I loved standing up in front of hundreds of other people out there in the public eye to support super hero couples striving to find their soul babies.
That’s when I realized that I want to do more than just write about this stuff. I want to advocate for it. I want to lobby for it.
For a living.
This isn’t the first time this bug has bit me.
When the whole foreclosure mess started I started attending foreclosure workshops to help people wade through the massive bureaucracy of the God awful complexities of what it takes to keep from losing your house when it all hits the fan.
I stood in front of state officials and yelled at them for setting up a mortgage refinance program that REQUIRED that people were 90 days late to be eligible.
Two years later, I sat across from several families who were severely upside down, but were able to refinance to much lower rates BECAUSE THEY PAID ON TIME.
Granted, a lot of collective effort went into making that happen way beyond my small contribution. But I felt a tremendous satisfaction knowing that I contributed my part.
So what about infertility advocacy?
I would imagine somewhere in the Washington DC or New York City think tank/advocacy/lobbying system they could use a guy’s opinion to go in there and help make the Family Act of 2011 a reality in 2013.
So I guess the thing is, I can’t really shut up, because if I just stay quiet about pursuing a new dream, a big ambition, with designs on big change, how do I expect it to ever happen except in my own mind?
I get so sick and tired of hearing how things will never change, the system is rigged against us, blah blah blah.
It reminds me of being told we’d never have a biological child or we shouldn’t go do an IVF a month after 9/11.
Sometimes you’ve just got to take a stand to do what you know God gave you the ability to do.
I don’t honestly know exactly what the path is to get there.
But I have every intention of getting there.
I’ve got a lot more to say about being an instrument of change, so forget about the stupid hiatus thing.
I feel like I’m just getting warmed up again, and I honestly can’t wait to realize the vision that is floating through my head.
If you’ve got new dreams, ambitions, things you’ve always dreamed of changing, I’d sure love to hear about them.
We need new vision, new hope, new ambition, new fire to replace the negaholism that is running rampant right now in this country.
My little IVF baby has showed me what can happen when you keep the faith and never stop believing in a vision for your future.
I owe it to her and the beautiful woman who brought her into this world to see this new vision through.
On to the next 200 days….