A few days ago I noticed a post on Resolve’s Facebook page asking how to handle one friend getting pregnant when another doesn’t.
Lisa had this happen with her best childhood friend about 4 years into our infertility battles.
There was nothing I could say to comfort the pain Lisa felt. I struggled to find an empathetic way to relate to what she was going through.
Around the Christmas holidays that year, I noticed her friend’s gift was still under the tree–the pain of another IVF loss during the holidays devastated Lisa to the point where we were largely reclusive for a couple of months.
Lisa slept a few feet away from the lone Christmas gift. too spent to enjoy the hooplah of the pending ball dropping into another childless year for us.
As I watched her fitful slumber, I wrote these lyrics.
One Woman Bears A Child, While The Other Bears The Cold
Linny’s changing diapers
Maggie’s changing doctors once again
Linny’s baby’s crying
Maggie cries a river with no end
Linny rocks her baby
Maggie tries to rock herself to sleep
Linny’s holding heaven
Maggie’s barely holding on to her sanity
Growing up they always dreamed they’d both have little girls
Now they’ve grown apart in two completely different worlds
One mother’s story starts
While the other prays to God hers will unfold
One woman bears a child
While the other bears the cold
Linny’s baby’s saying ma
Maggie’s saying silent prayers
Linny leaves a message
Maggie just pretends that she’s not there
Linny’s baby’s turning 2
Maggie’s turning 33
Christmas comes and goes
With Maggie’s gift under the tree
Growing up they always dreamed they’d both have little girls
Now they’ve grown apart in two completely different worlds
Where one mother’s story starts
While the other prays to God hers will unfold
One woman bears a child
While the other bears the cold
Linny spends the next three years trying for number two
Maggie finds a strength knowing she’s done all she can do
Linny reads that ept
There’s only one red line
And she starts to think of Maggie
And tears fill up her eyes
Growing up they always dreamed they’d both have little girls
Now they’ve grown apart in two completely different worlds
One mother’s story starts
While the other prays to God hers will unfold
One woman bears a child
While the other bears the cold
© Words and Music by Denny Ceizyk