Infertility Jokes–She Said, He Said

You’ve probably already read these jokes in an article written by Abbie Waters 13 Infertility Jokes to Make You Not Want to Punch Someone in the Face (link to the full original is pasted below) but I’ve decided to try my hand at adding the “he said” version of them.

She said: Thanks-for-the-infertility-advice
He said:

Thanks for the infertility advice! I feel better now knowing  it’s God’s will for me to have

an inadequate army of lazy swimming, deformed, triple and pin headed sperm

that require a doctor to weed out the freak show in my pants so we have a shot

at having a humanoid baby.

She said:


He said:

Oh, you just look at your wife and she gets pregnant?

I just told you we’re having trouble having a baby and you tell me that?

Why don’t you just kick me in the nuts too!

She said:


He said:

I apologize for the shit I said while my wife was on clomid.

She said:


He said:

On my honor, I will try not to de-ball the next insensitive macho jack ass who asks me

“What’s the matter–you shootin’ blanks?”

She said:Thanks-for-telling-me-to-just-have-sex-if-I-want-to-get-pregnant

 He said:

Thanks for offering “to get the job done for me if I can’t get my wife pregnant.”

I don’t know why I didn’t suggest that to our reproductive endocrinologist sooner.

She said: Nope-still-not-pregnant-but-thanks-for-pointing-out-how-fat-Ive-gotten


 He said:

Nope. Still not pregnant.

But thanks for sharing how you just “knocked up your old lady” again.

3 Responses to Infertility Jokes–She Said, He Said

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