Why is this so important to me?
I keep pondering that question as I write this 98th post in a row to keep the infertility guy awareness vibe going.
I read some inspiring, heart warming, heart breaking blogs posts during the past week, and am awed by the ongoing courage of so many aspiring parents.
In the day to day media I see and hear about so many examples of people who don’t value parenthood, or children, or motherhood, or fatherhood, and find myself beating back the desire to become jaded about the world I have brought my formerly frozen embryo into.
The past week reminded me of how many souls there are that value the possibility of parenthood so much that they will go through the seven circles of infertility hell to find their little piece of heaven.
I am reminded why I continue to write about this.
It’s for every mom to be or almost a father who just needs that extra assurance that it will be worth it, or that dark angry thought that just entered their head when they got that “oops, we’re having another” text.
It is also for all the parents who will enter a new world of stigma when they finally do have treatment success, and suddenly find that they are held to higher standard of parenting stress containment than any of their idiot factor counterparts.
After all, “this is what you wanted, isn’t it? Why are you complaining?”
Yeah–I haven’t posted that much about that, but it’s coming next.
Just when you thought it was safe to try out the new parent waters, you find out how painful the bite is of the sharks who think you should be completely emotional prepared for children since you waited SOOOO long for them.
Needless to say you were going through a never ending cycle of medical treatments leading up to the big pay day, so maybe after the daily emotional stress of wondering if everything inside their is going all right and perhaps having some complications along the way, by the time that little bundle of miraculous joy shows up, you are just dead freaking tired.
Then there’s the unexpected post partum issues that affect women after all those years of infertility, and that I’ve barely begun to touch the surface of.
You think that after all those years of hormone drugs, stopping and starting everything artificially that there might be a few challenges when all of the sudden all the medical intervention stops and the pregnancy hormones are gone? You have NO IDEA how many challenges there may be.
And guys, this will add a new chapter to the book of “learning how to keep your grace in ungraceful situations”.
So I will continue to write, because this IS important to me.
Elliana has given me joy I didn’t know was possible, but it wouldn’t have been possible if I’d have given up IVF treatments like I wanted to so many times.
Lisa continues to inspire me as she transforms herself, finding herself again after getting lost in six years of infertility treatments followed by 10 years of finding her way back after a brutal C-section and a
If I can help persuade one guy to step up and jump on board the IF train sooner than later, or at least step off the whiny baby boy caboose, then this will all be worth it.
Even when you get the joy of the ticket on aboard the successful IVF parent airline, the turbulence that you hit as a new parent will require a whole new level of understanding and support.